Dickie & 'bert

Russert: Democrats say this is failed foreign policy ... a quagmire ... they have a better way...
Mehlman: Tim, the liberals are trying to establish this as a "same ole shit" policy. I disagree, this isn't "same ole shit" versus "cut and run" ... we have no intention of pulling out to soon ... that would be messy ... we need to adapt and slide in and out and erect an Iraqi contingent in our place.
Dean: A-a-argh ... Tim ...its not "same old shit" versus "cut and run" ... its "same old shit" versus "redeploy and stand fast". Haw!
Russert: Dick Cheney, Tony Snow and now you have suggested "a vote for Lamont is a vote supporting Al Qeada" ...
Mehlman: I believe they referred to the vote being a vote for another 9/11. I on the other hand have been made aware of an investigation linking Lamont to Al Queada, but due to the sensitive nature and ongoing investigation, I cant give any further details...
Dean: Hee-yaw! The idea that Joe Lieberman is going to win as an independent is as plain wrong as the war in Iraq! Lamont knows what the people of Connecticut want ... Joe Lieberman is the wrong candidate, at the wrong time with the wrong cause... Yaharrr!

Dickie: Karl, please change the channel ...

McGlaughlin: 2,539 American soldiers dead, 62,287 injured, maimed or mentally impacted, 129,467 Iraqi's ...

Dickie: Ka-arl!

Wolf: US military officials have suggested that a gas explosion caused the explosion of two car bombs, and three katyusha rockets in Iraq. Standing in a 600 square foot crater, one investigator was quoted as saying "there just isnt any evidence", Pentagon officials stated the lack of bomb and rocket residue clearly indicates a gas explosion despite insurgent's claims of responsibility and witnesses claims of cars spontaneously combusting outside the buildings prior to an ear-piercing sound - heightening to a large blast...

Dickie: Karl!?

Wolf: FEMA officials have concluded their investigation into Katrina-related damage of the devastated St Bernard Parish. It appears a faulty kitchen tap was left dripping causing a significant degree of flooding and subsequent levee failure. Based upon this new information, a substantial number of claims to FEMA in the parish are being denied on the basis that flood insurance does not cover plumbing leaks.

Dickie: Ka-arl!!!!

Robertson: I was clearly misquoted and misrepresented, John... I said:

"God has enmity against those who, quote, 'divide my land... 'ere he is at the point of death. He was dividing God's land, and I would say woe unto any prime minister of Israel who takes a similar course."

... Some would liken that to me saying God took deference to Mr. Sharon's actions. I meant nothing by God's hand, I would say woe and hope this fool was assasinated. I mean really, John, he parceled off the Holy Land, promised to the Israelites, precedence to the coming of our lord Jesus Christ ... end of days ... the Rapture. One Jew cant change God's will...

Dickie: I'll be in my room ... reading...

The Donald: "... and I've said all along this will be a great challenge. One doesn't just wake up one day and say "hey, how about creating a democracy"... you need to fight for democracy... and that's what we're seeing, the people of Iraq engaging in the democratic process ... fighting for democracy ... can you imagine where we would be if the founding father's didn't fight for democracy? Carl?"
Carl Cameron: "Mr. Secretary ... Fox viewers want to know whether the expansion of the war on terror in Lebanon against the terrorist organization Hezbollah is having an impact against the jihadi terrorists of Al Quaeda in Iraq and whether the terror supporting governments of Syria and Iran will be able to maintain a terror front across this terror-ridden region."
The Donald: "Who knows?"
David Sanger: "The New York Times ..."
The Donald: "Who knows?"
Matthew Cooper: "Mis..."
The Donald: "Who-who-who..."

Dickie: Ka-arl! You're leaning on the button again!
Rove: bubble-bubble-bubble.... mmm, sorry ... whuuuuu.
Dickie: Put that away. You know I dont like that smell. And you leave that dirty water sitting on your desk for days.
P-sh-sh-sh-t (vacuum seal)
'bert: Senor Dickie, Senor Dickie!
Dickie: 'bert? Shouldn't you be with Chekov on the bridge doing that UK press release thingy?
'bert: Si, pero Senador Yo chay-said me down here. He wants to see jew...
Joe-mentum: I heard that racist comment...
Dickie: Geez, how many times... live in a goddam barn... Senator ... welcome...
Joe-mentum: You promised...
Dickie: Senator... .... mmmm .... Joe... please ... sit...
Joe-mentum: You said he had no chance... he could never win... You said he wouldnt break 20 points! You promised me a condition orange! You gave me nothing!
Dickie: Joe ... please .... hmm ... we picked up those ... errrr ... Egyptian students and we were sure the networks would jump at the chance to report a DHS misstep... I never expected the University to sit for over a week and then the story not to have any traction...
Joe-mentum: You promised...
Dickie: Tony came out for you rather nicely... And you know how the Brits are, they never want to pull the trigger too early.... Joe ... please sit... What's wrong with your thumbs ...
Joe-mentum: Oh, they're stuck this way. Usually, takes a week or two after the election before I can move them...
Dickie: Now Joe ..... hmmmmm ... you have the general election coming up .... mmmmm .... and Karl has it all taken care of ... Karl? what are you eating now?
Rove: mmmmmm, wings... Senator ... there is nothing to worry about ... who do you think leaked out Schlessinger's gambling problem? Hmmmm? Who do you think is prompting Ms. "Cobra II - anti-war" Urban to take his place? Hmmmmm? Just make sure you get your 25% base democrats to stick with you and we can handle the rest... And we did get those new machines...

Ann Compton: Mr. Chertoff? ... Mr. Chertoff ... are you alright?

Dickie: Ka-arl! Stop gloating and get back to work!
Rove: mmm, yes ... good question ... I think General Gonzalez can answer that... oh, I see he has stepped away, Catherine??

Chekov: mmm, yes ... good question ... I think Attorney General Gonzalez can answer that... oh, I see he has stepped away, Catherine??
Catherine Dodge: Mr. Secretary, can we anticipate delays in travel?